Conversations with Søren: On School

Søren, while gathering his Little People: "Oh, they need to go to school!"

Momma, fetching the appropriate vehicle: "Ah, here is their bus."

Søren: "School is scary."

Momma: "Really? Why is school scary?"

Søren: "Because of all the kids there."

Smitten

I could not get enough of this kid today:

I am in deep smitt.

The Thrid Anniversary of Søren's Birth Day!

Good morning "I am tree!"

He specifically requested I take a picture of "ducky" and "Edgar" holding hands.

Although his official party is not until later this week, today was the actual birthday. He requested "Aunt Summer's goat farm", which, gratefully, we could oblige. He requested this without even knowing what surprises would greet him there. They are getting ready for major construction so that they can start selling this cheese (and others), which has left major construction equipment within reach:

Søren "driving" the bull dozer.

This reminded us that he is still quite little.

This frightened us that he looks a little bit like George Bush.

Then it was on to the pinnacle of machinery, the track hoe.

He was VERY excited about this.

Driving

Realizing that these machines make us all look small.

Settling onto something a little more manageable.

Several other momma's have shared their birth stories on their children's birthday's, and that might be coming, but not tonight.

Nature Walk and/or Berry Slaughtering

Today we meandered the Rock Creek Trail near by on a search for black berries.


Two of my men loom in the distance:


While I stroll with the treasure:


We found this berry slaughterer. You might think this child looks full:


But this is what happened when he didn't get the "more" he requested:


Vicious creatures roam these trails! Watch out.

Art

The heavens were declaring yesterday.
I wish the photo could do it justice.

Home Experiments

I would like to insist that I am just your average housewife.

I do happen to brew our own beverages, make our own bread and various other pantry items and condiments myself, and I do buy nearly everything with the exception fresh produce outside of the grocery store, but really, my life is very normal. I spend too much time on the computer, live in a little upscale townhouse, rent movies from Netflix, you know, the usual. I'm your normal suburban housewife (read: I AM STILL NOT A HIPPIE!)

I say this to defend what I am about to share. Three weeks ago I was inspired to try switching to washing my hair with baking soda, and conditioning with apple cider vinegar.

When I became a mother, 3 years ago tomorrow, I was a full-time senior at a rather consuming little school in Eugene. Between the demands and wonders of new motherhood and the demands and fullness of a devoted student of great ideas, well, words like "regular" took on new meaning.

I felt like I regularly cleaned our bathroom, but my husband disagreed. Attempting regular showers somehow evened out to washing my hair about once a week. This bothered me for a good long time (though truly, I was only a wash my hair 2-3 times a week person anyway), but it was a sufficiently long time for my hair to get over hoping for anything more regular. Miraculously, the body adjusts to how much you wash it. So actually, my hair produces much less oil than women who get more "regular" showers.

Anyhow, in my attempts to be more careful about what I am really putting into my body (and the skin and scalp absorbs stuff without the benefit of digestion), I thought I would join a friend's experiment with not using shampoo. Instead I mix up a little paste of baking soda that I massage over my scalp, rinse thoroughly, and then I pour diluted apple cider vinegar over the ends as conditioner and again rinse thoroughly (this link for specific instructions).

One of the reasons this appealed to me dates all the way back to the 11th grade in Mr. Bierman's Chemistry class. We had a reading assignment about how there is no such thing as a shampoo-and-conditioner-in-one very simply because a shampoo needs to be a base to break down organic matter (grim, oil, dirt, etc) and conditioner is an acid to return pH balance to the hair. A pH neutral goo would neither wash nor condition. You would just be getting whatever benefit water combined with rubbing with some good smelly goo would do. Baking soda is a base, and vinegar an acid. Aha! Shampoo and Conditioner. Thank you Mr. Bierman - and yes, some students actually listen and retain all that stuff!

What I read about switching warned about allowing for transition time in your oil production as your scalp adjusts to not having to compensate for copious amounts of soap stripping all oil from it. I think I had a running start with my motherhood-induced self-neglect.

Here are my findings:

#1) My hair is softer to the touch, and less frizzy looking. One might want to use a description like, soft, sensuous waves. This is the hair I desperately wanted back in 11th grade.

#2) It does seem to get oily a touch sooner (perhaps a day...which on my schedule is about 1/7 earlier than normal) BUT...

#3) It is a different (more pleasant, more natural) kind of oily that is easily distributed with a good boars bristle brush. I brush twice a day and still do not have to wash it but once a week (but admittedly, I would REALLY enjoy washing twice a week, as I do like to wear my hair down and curly, and need more washings for that).

My theory is that with conventional shampoos there are additives and residues that invariably get left on my hair (I have rather porous hair as well, which is part of why I can go so long between washings). These residues actually act a little like glue, adhering oil, dirt, and dust to my head and making it look dirty faster. With nothing but my natural oils that so easily distribute, my hair looks pretty good all the time.

The husband's report:

#1) No strange smells (so, good, I was a little worried I was walking around smelling like apple cidar vinegar - NOT alluring).

#2) Very soft

#3) Looks fine - more specifically, "had not noticed a difference," but when pressed, did admit is looks less frizzy.

HURRAH! Lower maintenance (not too mention FAR less costly) with better results.
That makes a girl happy.

Experiment concluded.

Conversations with Søren: On More Children

Momma: So, I was thinking we could take the crib down in your guys room today.

Søren: No momma, that's for where we put babies down for sleeping.

Momma: Well, we don't have any babies right now.

Søren: Well, you need to grow some babies!

Recover

Clouds cover and a cool breeze refreshes without mocking, as dripping clouds were not desired either. The windows all open to blow out the residual heat, mug, and aroma of hot house guests and selves.

Ah, but the dust, the dust does mock.
The vacuum comes out.
The brooms swish.
Out, out, damn dust!
Off the porch! Off the shoes!
No one wants to remember you!
With no lingering sign of dust, still there is cleaning, wiping, sweeping.
Out, out, damn dust!

Slowly, items settle back into their places. The evidence of the weekend suddenly disapears as home returns. Then there is music. Filling the house with warm, full vibrations, fingers pound out the melodies that have relieved aches for fifteen years. Fingers trip in the same places, but these familiar chronic failures cover and comfort the acute ones.

Morning Musing

With Soren, I carefully lead him (so I thought) down a path towards personhood. I invested so much time in equipping him to communicate, showing him how to enjoy life's little blessings of music, dance, and laughter. I helped him learn to crawl, to dance, to keep time, to walk, to run, to jump. The path from infancy to kid-dom looked to me like a bit of an incline, and I wanted to hold his hand, keep him steady, and help him make good time.

With Elliot I have marveled in the wonder of infancy, reveling in it's simplicity and beauty. I have intentionally not worked AT ALL on helping him walk. I have loved having a baby. Of course, we have still wanted to help him communicate and enjoy life, but I still have this elder one who consumes so much of my energy (and was so used to my utter and complete devotion before the arrival of his brother). There is much less time spent reading, much less time spent sitting for hours on the floor talking about colors and shapes as we build towers and nest blocks and sort them into their appropriately-shaped holes. Yet somehow, it is as if the hill from infancy to kid-dom is a decline for him, and he has decided to somersault down it while I thought we could stretch it out since I wasn't holding his hand up it.

Now here he is, toddling after his brother around the house. Climbing with ease over and on everything. Coming and grabbing me and pointing outside and saying "go". He conducts with equally good time-keeping as his brother. He understands the humor and delight in life better than the rest of us at times. He is opinionated and loud about it. He waves and nods and shakes his head to communicate with people, and has a remarkable ability to understand everything we say. He's 14 months old and already we have to spell things around him. He is completely devoted to his Daddy and brother. Nothing makes him happier than the sight of the whole family around the table. He is social, vocal, dexterous, capable - and I had little to do with it.

The fact of the matter is, I thought I could speed things up for Soren, and I hoped I might be able to slow things down with Elliot and savor them more. Truth is, they come out fully human. They don't need a lot of help, just plenty of love and some opportunity.

Photo Update, pt 2

So...after our train adventure and dinner with the family, we came and crashed at a dear friends house and settled in for some good visiting.

Soren and Indy at 7:00am

Indy explaining existentialism.

This beautiful girl enjoying muffin bites.

Lunch date at the park

I love these little people!

Discovering a nearby fountain we were later told wasn't treated -
but thus far we all seem just fine!

Enjoying the water

Next we were off to the Sunday market on Capital Hill to enjoy some produce shopping and a little dancing to the live music.

Back at our friend's house for some engineering with lovely lovely blocks that have me saving for our own collection.

Then it was time to be out-numbered for serious play.

Delightful Kate joined us!

It was a kid haven.

This little lady enjoyed all the commotion, and was a peach the whole time.

My own sleep-deprived children were pretty peachy too.

The momma's got in some good laughs as well, and Laurie enjoyed Sabine while hoping that the little one she is currently building will be a little sister so sweet (spoon voted girl).

After reviewing the photos, and missing my friends, I think I would have to say, yes, the train was indeed worth it.

Like a Child

Lately I have learned a lot watching my children interact with me. They have absolutely zero insecurities about loving me and each other. They have zero hesitations about telling me their needs, and reminding me to meet them. They see nothing wrong with expecting me to meet all of their needs. They are completely comfortable with the fact that I clean their rear-ends, wipe their faces, and help them put on their clothes. They do not feel "cheesy" for running (or speed crawling) up to me periodically throughout the day and hugging me, squeezing my leg, resting their heads on me, or looking me earnestly in the eyes to say "I think you're wonderful Momma" (yes, this kills me - a sweet death) or "I need you snuggles".

They love me so unabashedly even though I feel like I am CONSTANTLY disciplining and instructing them and giving them reason to dislike me. To make it worse, I am constantly failing to be as patient and graceful and loving as I ought to be while training them. I am riddled with fallibility and they still trust me completely.

Soren knows me so well. He knows when to ask "Momma, you fustated?" or "Momma, you mad at me?" without ever questioning my love for him. He knows when he fails, and he doesn't worry about it changing our relationship. He is a child. He is totally comfortable with who he is.

They know they don't know much. They can't help themselves from "unacceptable" actions from time to time. Yet, they come to me again and again, accept the training I give them, and never withhold themselves or their love from me. They know my love for them surpasses any "unacceptable" behavior.

Their love and devotion to me and willingness to be completely free and unabashedly transparent with me is humbling. It is humbling because that is how I ought to interact with God, who is my ultimate (and at this point, my only) Father. Not only that, but he is not riddled with fallibility. He is perfect. My sons act this way towards me while I screw up and am undeserving of the honor of being their mother. God never screws up, and I know He loves me better than I love my boys. I know He disciplines me perfectly.

"If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him?" (Luke 11:13)

Why am I constantly tempted to think His love for me has anything to do with my ability to act properly. He knows I am a child. I need reminding. Why do I not freely throw myself into his grace, forgiveness and love? It is there as soon as I recognize my need for it!

And they were bringing children to Him so that He might touch them; but the disciples rebuked them. But when Jesus saw this, He was indignant and said to them, "Permit the children to come to Me; do not hinder them; for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Truly I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child will not enter it at all." And He took them in His arms and began blessing them, laying His hands on them. (Matt 13:16)

How grateful I am for parenthood, for it shows me what it looks like to receive like a child!

Photo Update!

I was ambitious last month. I decided to take a train trip up to Seattle with the boys...just the little boys, sans husband. I thought the train would be cheaper and easier on us than a 3 1/2 hour car ride.

Well...it may have been cheaper, and it was probably FAR more interesting for them, but I don't think "easier" is the word I would use to describe it. What I first thought of the train I thought about how we could all sit next to each other, and I could read to them, and we could play, and we could even take bathroom breaks without stopping and go for little walks from time to time.

Ha!

What I didn't think about was the fact that the train ride up would be completely full, and full of adults without children, who wanted to sleep. We were also placed in one of the seats that face the other peoples seats, so gratefully there were two young women seated accross from us who didn't mind (or didn't show it) getting their feet stepped on from time to time, or cars and books dropped on them. I had high hopes of them sleeping away half the travel time because I planned the trip over nap time. No, it was far too exciting on the train, and neither slept, nor even enjoyed the calm that sometimes substitutes sleep. Elliot, was not excited about being stuck in one little place either. I felt like I was on a constant adrenalin rush trying to keep them happy and quiet for four hours. When we arrived in Seattle, six people turned to me and complemented the boys on how well they did (this was nicer than some of the things I heard women murmur to each other behind me as we went for a walk down to the dining car. Things like "what is she thinking bringing small children on a train alone?" or "I'm just glad they're not in our car").

The ride home was better and worse. The train was much emptier, and we actually enjoyed a group of four seats all to ourselves for the entire trip! The boys, and myself, fell asleep for the first hour (from complete exhaustion...pictures are coming to fill in the non-travel elements of our get-a-way). I roused at one point quite excited that they were actually asleep and actually got to do some reading. Unfortunately, at one of the stops Soren was jolted out of his sleep in a non-rested, non-awake state of mind. This creates only one response: scream crying. Lovely. Especially lovely for everyone else in our car (none of whom, mind you, complemented us when the ride was over). I took Soren out to the space between cars to try to help him wake up and calm down. Really, the crying only lasted five minutes. Unfortunately, no one, not even your own mother, wants to hear you cry for five minutes. Once he woke up life was alright again - dare I say pleasant - for the remaining trip home. Even, when the last 2 hours took 3 instead because of track construction and a late train coming up from California. Ug. It was so nice to get home. The boys (and I) were quite excited to see their Daddy.

Lesson learned: Do not travel with car seats. Trucking around two car seats, a double stroller, our luggage, toiletries, diaper/entertainment bag, and my purse was not fun for either of the short time periods I had to have it all with us. Next time I'll make sure our transport comes equipped with their own car seats. (though, if you must, the train station was very pleasant about checking everything).

Now, onto the fun stuff! What makes Seattle worth all that trouble are the people in the following photographs:

We were picked up by "Gigi" and "Papi" for dinner

Soren, a little dazed, and yes, he fell on his face the day before, with Gigi and Aunt Jen.

Jen and her Beau, Matt

Papi

Elliot who finally made time to nap.

Then we hit the streets of Seattle for a little adventure.

Jen and Soren get ready to look famous.

Elliot gives Gigi the walking tour.

We quickly found the water.

The boys loved it.

It was a lovely lovely day to be by the water.
Elliot trying his darnedest to chaperon.

Then it was off to a park for a closer look.

Elliot made his way too.
Soren got to work getting all these rocks back out in the water.
Elliot, just wanted water...and got a wave full up in his face.
He then decided to appreciate the water from higher ground.

While we were there cool people did this:


Okay. More on day two to come.